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Que? by Vicki McLeod

I’ve got a big problem with my hearing. There are some things I just don’t seem to be able to catch. Low frequency sounds. It could be all that time I spent wearing headphones when I worked in the theatre another lifetime ago. Perhaps, just like I blew out the bass on the car stereo speakers one day when I played a Jeff Buckley song too loud on a long road trip, I’ve blown out my ear drums (that’s not a great idea, I hope that hasn’t happened, I’m still, ahem, waiting for my new Son Espases appointment). My husband, on the other hand, has crazy high pitched buzzing noises in his ears whenever he gets tired. Sometimes we cannot hear each other there’s so much background noise going on. Thank God there are other ways to communicate: well, you have heard about body language, and it is our anniversary. It’s ten years since we met. In a bar, I was singing in (back when I could hear), in Islington. Feels like yesterday, and another one of those lifetimes ago. So much has happened in the last decade, to us and to the world: financial disaster, marriage, baby, business, home buying, relocation, changing careers, twice, messed up modern families, environmental chaos, the need to own more stuff than you can actually use. Well, that and more, but I only have 500 words here.

So, perhaps this was an opportune moment for Lucy Egg to walk into my life. (I know, crazy name).  I came across her; she’s like a granny in a whirlwind, with attitude, at one of those networking events on the island (they are great, more on that another time). She’s a life and business coach who specialises in relationships. I tell her about mine, not just with my fella, but with my family. It’s all a bit messy. ‘Come on honey, you need to play more’. ‘What?!’ This is serious stuff here, Lucy, this is my life. ‘That’s why you shouldn’t take it so seriously’.  She runs a course on ‘Talking to Men’ which I’m going to go on, I know I need to improve my Spanish, but I also need to improve my ‘man talk’ or better still, my ‘man communication’ (it could be my ears, but I can’t entirely blame them).  So, when I should be celebrating my birthday in February (btw Aquarians rock) I will  be at Bodhana Wellness Centre in Portals trying to learn about how to create better relationships with the men in my life. (I’d like to find a course on ‘Figuring out who to be less mad at’, but she doesn’t run that yet).

In the meantime, how will we celebrate our anniversary? It turns out that we will mainly be flying to the UK and trying to not spend more money than we earn in Big Tescos. As the likelihood of accruing enough points is minimal, the thrill has gone. As ever, I’ll report back.

(published in on Thursday 20th January 2011)

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